The phrase "don't judge me" seems to be a popular one among young people in our modern culture. It is typically meant humorously in response to amusement from one's peers when caught doing something ridiculous or strange. For example, upon being greeted by the sight of a close friend dressed in an outlandish get-up involving hiking boots with speedos the expected response would be laughter. The friend with the questionable fashion sense might then respond good naturedly with "don't judge me." In this sense we are dealing with nothing more than humor among buddies. However, I have also seen the phrase used in concept if not in exact word in and among Christians when being confronted with sin issues in their lives. This concerns me greatly. I fear that some Christians resist biblical judgment from other believers in an attempt to excuse away their own ungodly behavior. Anyone who professes to have a relationship with Jesus must guard against this sinful conduct.
Let me be clear that there is indeed a form of judging which is not in accordance with biblical truth. This would be what Jesus was referring to in His famous condemnations of Pharisaical hypocrisy in Matthew 7:3-5 and John 8:7. Unfortunately, sometimes Christians take those passages and apply them carte blanche to any and all situations where they are confronted with their own sin. They commit the common but inexcusable error of informing their philosophy with only a piece of what God has said about a topic instead of considering additional information He has provided in scripture. Jesus was not condemning all forms of judging in the Matthew passage. He was making the point that judging others while at the same time ignoring your own sin is foolishness (see Romans 2:1-11). Nor was He excusing the sin of the adulterous woman in John. In fact, if one continues to read the John passage, in verse 11 He tells her to stop sinning herself.
In both cases what Jesus was really doing was confronting the Pharisees' with the truth that they condescendingly judged others while wallowing in their own systematic and unrepentant sin. The issue with the Pharisaical judging was not the act of judging itself but the hypocritical heart attitude behind the judgments!
Contrary to false teaching that all judging is wrong there is most definitely a proper time and place for judgment and confrontation of sin among Christians. We already know from the preceding passages that hypocritical judgement is sinful. But biblical truth doesn't stop there. To obtain a fuller picture there are a multitude of passages we could draw from. For the sake of brevity I will briefly focus primarily on only two of them: Matthew 18:15 and Galatians 6:1-5.
Matthew 18:15 is part of a larger passage that deals with the proper procedure for confronting sin in a local church body. For the purposes of this discussion I just want to focus on the instructions in verse 15. We are clearly advised that confrontation is the correct course of action when a brother's (or sister's) sin is involved. There is no ambiguity here. In Galatians 6:1-5 Paul continues the brush strokes found in Matthew by explaining that this confrontation must be done in a spirit of gentle love rather than harsh condemnation.
The complete picture that can be drawn from these various passages is twofold. First, we as individuals must constantly evaluate our own hearts to be sure we have no unconfessed sin in our lives. The key word there is unconfessed. As 1 John 1:8 tells us, we all sin. If we all sin and the act of sinning itself immediately precludes us from ever judging anyone (as misinterpreters of John 8:7 would suggest) then it would be completely illogical and contradictory for Matthew 18:15 and Galatians 6:1 to also instruct us to confront sin when we encounter it. Since we know that the bible is God's revealed word and God is incapable of error (Psalm 18:30) then we must assume there is a logical explanation for this impasse. The answer can be found by continuing to read the passage in 1 John. Verse 9 reveals that sin once confessed is forgiven and the sinner is cleansed from unrighteousness; thereby making them qualified to pass judgment when appropriate. In fact, after being glorified that is exactly the role children of God will assume in Christ's kingdom (1 Corinthians 6:2-3).
The second component of biblical judging is the attitude carried by the judge. The aforementioned Galatians 6 passage as well as 2 Timothy 2:24-26 reveal the proper motivation for someone contemplating an act of Christian judgment. Is the desire to see a brother or sister restored to union with Christ? Or is it to build oneself up by tearing others down? Is the love of Jesus toward a sibling in mind as found in John 13:35? Or is a cold and unfeeling adherence to the letter of the law all that is in view? The answer to this question will reveal immediately whether you should be confronting sin or possibly getting on your knees in repentance yourself.
On the flip side of the coin, how should we respond when we are on the receiving end of judgment? How can we know whether the person confronting us is doing so correctly? And what if we are confronted with anger or hostility rather than compassion and love? The simple answer is that we shouldn't worry about any of that. Only God knows the hidden truths contained in man's heart (1 Corinthians 2:11). And there are a litany of verses that tell us to receive instruction and admonishment with a glad heart. 1 Peter 5:5 takes the view of being approached by one's elder, or one in whom wisdom is found, and listening to their instruction with humility. 2 Timothy 3:16 reminds that one of the functions of scripture is for reproof. And my personal favorite is found in Proverbs 13:18 where Solomon goes right for the jugular by revealing the stupidity of anyone who dislikes correction. It could be argued that a hostile confrontation by a brother or sister may need to be confronted itself in the due course of time. But wisdom and discernment should dictate that this secondary confrontation needs to be handled delicately and separated by some passage of time from the situation to which we are currently involved in. So rather than wasting time and energy trying to immediately determine if we are being confronted by someone with a clean heart our best course of action is to receive instruction with humility and then join the Holy Spirit in a serious examination of ourselves to root out the possible sin that may be hiding in our inner man.
As David sings in the climactic verses of Psalm 139, the cry of our hearts should be for God to cleanse us from sin by any means necessary.
Don't judge me? On the contrary, please judge me!
Soli Deo Gloria
Amen,!!! You never cease to amaze me...love you
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