Cats, Fathers, and Cradles

I think I've always been secretly terrified of being the father described in "Cats in the Cradle" by Harry Chapin.  

For those unfamiliar with the song, it's about a man who is too busy with work and life to be there to spend time with his son.  His son learns to walk while he is away, presumably on a business trip.  For his 10th birthday the man purchases his son a ball.  The boy wants his father to play with the new ball with him but dad has too much work to do.  Throughout these boyhood snapshots the little boy constantly says that he wants to be just like his dad some day.  

Later, we see the son coming from college.  By this time life has slowed down for the man.  He wants to sit and talk with his son who is on the verge of adulthood.  But all the kid is interested in is borrowing the car.  The final scene describes the father after retirement, calling his son to talk.  But once again the son is too busy to spend time with his "old man."  The song concludes as the father finally realizes, in the twilight of his life, that his son did indeed turn out just like him in the worst possible way.

I've linked the song below in case you're interested in hearing it.

I have a love/hate relationship with this "stupid" song.  I love the musical composition.  And Harry Chapin was great at weaving a tale through his lyrical abilities (although apparently the inspiration for the song was a poem written by his wife, but I digress).  But it's such a horribly bittersweet song filled with pain, heartache, and a wasted life that it makes me pensive with thought every time I listen to it.  I've often wondered if there's a deeper reason for the way this song plays with my emotions.

My own father was out of the picture in my life at a very early age; 2 or 3 I believe.  Although I had variously frequent and infrequent contact with him as the years went by I grew up without his daily presence.  I never recall having any mental or emotional issues because of this.  Perhaps it was because the separation happened when I was too young to really grasp what was going on.  Perhaps it's a credit to my mother for working tirelessly to instill a solid foundation of self worth in me.  Most likely it's a mixture of both reasons.

I think it's because of this solid personal stability that I've been blessed with that I have never felt unduly saddened by the disconnection I experienced with my father.  And listening to "Cats in the Cradle" never results in me missing my dad.  What it does do is terrify me.  It terrifies me that I might unknowingly become the father described in the song; so busy with my life that I neglect being a presence in my children's lives.  Logically I know perfectly well that I am nowhere near the man described in the song.  And for that matter I know full well that I am nowhere near my own father, at least in terms of my bond with my children.  Nevertheless, every single time I've listened to it over the years, "Cats in the Cradle" unfailingly manages to produce this subtle paranoia in the back of my mind.  The fear is reinforced as I watch my son grow older and I see how our interests are diverging with the passage of time.  As he grows it seems to take more effort on my part to find ways to spend time with him.  I am tremendously thankful that I see the danger presented by that particular relational cliff now rather than years from now through the crystal clear mirror of hindsight.

I've often wondered if this completely irrational secret worry of mine has its roots in the childhood absence of my dad.  Curious, very curious.  But regardless of where it comes from I won't trade this fear for anything.  I believe fear can be healthy if managed well.  I never want to lose my fear of being a bad father.  It pulls me back from the brink of anger when I'm especially aggravated by the kids.  It keeps me grounded when I'm feeling selfish and tired of sacrificing my time for my family.  It gives me clarity when reflecting the morning after a particularly poor night of parenting.  It keeps me mindful and appreciative of the devotion shown me by my heavenly father.  It drives me to strive to be the teaching father of Proverbs 4:1-9, the compassionate father of Psalm 103:13, and the non provoking father of Ephesians 6:4.

So I will keep this particular baseless and irrational fear thank you very much.

Lens Crafters

As I read through the Pentateuch I can’t help but contemplate the vast difference that can be observed between the theocratic law handed down to Israel by God through Moses and the often democratically fueled cultural relativism that seems to permeate the world view of the average human today. And that's really the crux of the issue; one's world view. What is the baseline, the cornerstone, the foundation of how you perceive the world around you. Does it begin with the ascendancy of your rights and prerogatives as a sentient creature? Or is God's sovereignty and prerogatives the lens through which you see His creation?

Our society’s fixation on personal equal rights for all makes it quite difficult I think to read through ancient Israel’s laws without revulsion and disdain.  It’s no wonder really that God is so often portrayed by people today as a bloodthirsty tyrant who has no place in modern society.  The fuel they typically prefer to use for their fire is the many examples throughout the Old Testament of laws which seem backward and uncivilized to our modern minds.  One example can be found in Deuteronomy 17:2-7.  The Law as given through Moses dictates that if anyone is accused of worshiping other gods in the manner of the heathen nations Israel was going in to dispossess, that person was to be immediately executed if the charges were proven to be true.  This particular law concludes with the sentence “You must purge the evil from you.”  I am confident that any average “modern” citizen of the U.S. or any other western nation would be horrified by reading such a thing.

The reason for the harshness of this law is that Israel was God’s chosen nation.  As such they had to be uniquely holy and blameless to the nations around them so as to accurately reflect God’s attributes and thus showcase His glory.  It was absolutely critical for this to work that the Israelites could not, under any circumstances, engage in the despicable practices (including infanticide via burning to death) of the false religions they were surrounded by.  Therefore God knew that any tendencies toward even the “tamest” of these heathen practices would in time lead Israel down a path of forsaking Him and decreasing His glory and thus necessitated purging immediately and with finality. Even if we do not completely understand how summary capital punishment for an Israelite found practicing pagan idolatry can be right and true we must accept that it is because scripture tells us that God is perfectly just and good (Exodus 34:5-7, Psalm 18:30, Matthew 5:48).

Could God have instead implemented a system of counseling a wayward citizen back from the brink of idolatry or any other approach which might seem less draconian to us?  Perhaps, but that’s really beside the point.  God in His perfectly manifested and perfectly synchronized justice and omniscience chose not to do it that way.  He chose to do it in a manner that best exalted His name.  His glory was and is of paramount importance, not that of one of His creations.  And this I believe is the foundational worldview-shaping truth which is anathema to modern unregenerate mankind.  The idea that anyone or anything in the universe should be ascribed greater worth than oneself is a detestable thought to a heart which has always been and currently is in rebellion against God.

So the question is this.  Who built the lens you use to perceive reality?  Was it you or is it God?  The answer to this question has ramifications far beyond your opinion of justice in ancient Israel.  It will shape how you see everything from the doctrine of salvation to church polity, from the role of women in ministry to forgiveness, from judgment among Christians to evangelism.  If your lens was constructed by you then you cannot help but have a problem with the concept of God’s authority.  It may not manifest itself in every area of your theology but it must come out sooner or later.  And when it does it will be in favor of your rights and prerogatives, not God’s.

Nap Time

Richard Wurmbrand (1909-2001) was a Romanian Christian pastor.  He spent 14 years in communist prisons.  He endured physical and mental abuse the likes of which we cannot begin to imagine because he refused to recant his faith.  The communist governments of the former U.S.S.R. and eastern bloc European countries as well as present day communist countries such as China and North Korea were and are barbarically oppressive of Christians.  A world view such as communism which is predicated upon the state being the supreme authority and benefactor in people's lives cannot tolerate any competing religions which might undermine their power base through belief in a supreme being.

By the way, the state "religion" of any communist regime is classically atheist.  I intentionally use the word religion to describe atheism.  Religion can be defined as "a cause, principle, or system of beliefs held to with ardor and faith."  Regardless of whether we as a culture typically view atheism as a religion it is in point of fact very much one.

But back to Mr. Wurmbrand.  Among the litany of physical tortures he suffered were multiple broken bones, a dozen or so places on his body where his flesh was carved into, 18 puncture wounds, years of solitary confinement, repeated brainwashing for up to 17 hours a day for weeks and months at a time, being frozen to within minutes of dying before being revived repeatedly, and enduring an agonizing separation from his wife and son.

This giant of faith would eventually be released and ransomed by western Christian organizations so that he could escape to the west.  After doing so he founded Voice of the Martyrs, a group dedicated to the relief and advocacy of persecuted Christians around the world.  Today VoM is active across the globe, distributing hundreds of thousands of newsletters each month and providing relief to thousands of Christian martyrs.

Here are three quotes from Richard Wurmbrand on the state of the western church.

•  “I suffer in the west more than I did in communist lands. I suffer in the west more than I suffered in a communist jail because now I see with my own eyes the western civilization dying.”
• “The underground Church is a poor and suffering church but it has no lukewarm members.”
• “The west sleeps.”

Christian, are you as useless as lukewarm water; neither good for cooling and refreshing or for salving and cleansing?  If someone were to sample your "spiritual water" would you be so distasteful that they would spit you out?  Does your mouth profess love for Jesus while your heart is far from him?  Are you asleep in the light, enjoying the comforts of freedom and wealth while the truth and authority of the word of God is slowly and methodically destroyed by the religion of atheism in America?

Awake, sleeper, and arise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.

Soli Deo Gloria

Sound and Fury, Signifying Nothing

My apologies to Mr. Shakespeare for shamelessly stealing part of his line.

Anger.  Is it an emotion?  Dictionary.com seems to think so; it defines anger as "a strong feeling of displeasure and belligerence aroused by a wrong".  Poor Merriam-Webster apparently doesn't know what it thinks about anger.  Its entry for anger points to angry which points back to anger.  Huh?  Perhaps they think that anger is such a common and obvious piece of the human experience that no one truly needs a real definition of it.  I would agree that with very few exceptions visitors to Merriam-Webster's web site already think they know all about anger.  But perhaps anger has been mislabeled, misinterpreted, and misunderstood by humans since that little matter of fruit in the garden.

I have been studying the book of James lately.  A few weeks ago I ran across a pretty familiar passage but this time it decided to jump out and hit me between the eyes.

James 1:19-20 - Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.

It sounds pretty simple; we should not respond hastily about anything.  I've always accepted it at that level and moved on.  But what happens if we dig into this passage a little deeper?  

Let me set a couple of baselines for my conclusions first.  I'm not going to spend the time to dissect each of these core beliefs in this post.  But it is essential to at least know where I'm coming from, even if you don't know why.

• God is the only absolute good in the universe
• God and by extension His revealed word are the only absolute truths in the universe
• All of reality is defined by the two preceding statements
• Man, as a being created by God, must align his system of beliefs with God's standard if he wishes to hold a world-view that matches reality

With those items as the basis for progression let's look at the end of our passage first; "for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God."  About God's righteousness Psalm 7:11 has this to say: God is a righteous judge, And a God who has indignation every day.  Immediately we see a contrast.  Man's anger does not produce righteousness.  But God can be both righteous and indignant (i.e. angry) at the same time.  Clearly there must be a vast difference between man's anger and God's anger.  Therefore anything we think we know about anger should be automatically suspect.  With that in mind I go back to our web definitions above.  Anger is defined as a feeling, which is a synonym for emotion.  I believe this is accurate in terms of how anger is expressed and viewed by humanity.  But in light of our preceding conclusion that our own understanding is suspect I believe we should be prepared to accept that we might just be wrong about our understanding of anger.  

In other words, we as humans tend to think of anger as an emotional response to a situation we dislike.  But I am suggesting that anger handled the correct way (i.e. the biblical way) is not an emotional response at all.  Allow me to explain.

First I should note that James is not referring to a specific situation or type of encounter here.  His purpose is to present a series of general life guidelines and how we should respond to them.  There is a theme throughout James of actions speaking louder than words but he doesn't get into the meat of that argument until chapter two and after.  This first chapter certainly has elements of it but the individual vignettes contained here are still mostly autonomous.  It's kind of like a section of detailed proverbs, each of which can be applied in a broad sense.  Therefore it is best understood that our passage is intended to be taken in the same way.

So let's take a look at the progression of responses James and the Holy Spirit chose to use.

1. quick to hear
2. slow to speak
3. slow to anger

Taken independently of each other these three elements all can be understood to mean roughly the same thing as mentioned above; don't be hasty.  But what if they are intended to be followed in a chronological sequence?  I believe that paints a very different picture.  

First, we should always be ready to listen to what others have to say.  This should be the initial response to every situation; to hear what is being said.  Sadly, far too often I don't manage to even get past this first step because my own self importance gets in the way and drives me to spout off with what I think I know.  

Only after we have listened fully should we speak, and slowly at that.  I do not believe this phrasing necessarily calls for an actual decrease in the cadence of words flowing out of our mouths (although it might not be a bad idea sometimes).  Rather it points to an increase in the thoughtfulness and care applied to our choices about which words flow out of our mouths.  Instead of dashing off a hasty rebuttal in the heat of the moment we should carefully and critically assess what we are about to say.  

Words are incredibly powerful devices.  Later in his book James calls the tongue "a restless evil and full of deadly poison".  It is not the physical member of our bodies that is being referenced here but that which flows from it.  Words, whether spoken or written, have the power to destroy people and topple governments.  Consider the case of Egypt these past few years.  A regime decades in power eventually toppled by mere words which led to ideas and progressed beyond the ability of those in power to check.  On a personal level, words once uttered usually cannot be completely taken back.  No matter how much one apologizes or how much biblical forgiveness is sought after the specter of poorly chosen words has the potential to hang in the air like a deadly cloud, souring relationships and fueling resentment.  Throw them around hastily at your peril.
Finally, only after hearing completely and responding carefully should the notion of anger even be entertained.  And James emphasizes slowness even here at the far end of our response spectrum.    

I believe the Holy Spirit belabors the point of slowing down because He fully understands how difficult this concept of deliberate measured responses would be for us to understand.  We of the fast 21st century lifestyles who dash off 10 texts in half as many minutes (conservatively!), air inter-personal drama with all 857 of our Facebook friends, and share with Twitter what we had for lunch.  All while surfing 3 news web sites and scanning the RSS feeds of 5 more with the television blaring in the background.

To sum all of this up here is the revelation that struck me as I read James 1:19-20.  Anger is typically understood as an emotional feeling triggered quickly and acted upon hastily.  But the anger that I see prescribed by James is far from a fast response to stimuli.  Rather, it is a carefully considered and reasoned decision about how to deal with a situation.

Thus speaking to the point of this post, I'm not so sure that biblical anger as found in James should even be classified properly as an emotion.  And I don't know about anyone else, but of the many and varied times in my life that I have been angry not many have looked anything like the process described above.  

Sound and fury, signifying nothing indeed...

Soli Deo Gloria

Please Judge Me

The phrase "don't judge me" seems to be a popular one among young people in our modern culture.  It is typically meant humorously in response to amusement from one's peers when caught doing something ridiculous or strange.  For example, upon being greeted by the sight of a close friend dressed in an outlandish get-up involving hiking boots with speedos the expected response would be laughter.  The friend with the questionable fashion sense might then respond good naturedly with "don't judge me."  In this sense we are dealing with nothing more than humor among buddies.  However, I have also seen the phrase used in concept if not in exact word in and among Christians when being confronted with sin issues in their lives.  This concerns me greatly.  I fear that some Christians resist biblical judgment from other believers in an attempt to excuse away their own ungodly behavior.  Anyone who professes to have a relationship with Jesus must guard against this sinful conduct.

Let me be clear that there is indeed a form of judging which is not in accordance with biblical truth.  This would be what Jesus was referring to in His famous condemnations of Pharisaical hypocrisy in Matthew 7:3-5 and John 8:7.  Unfortunately, sometimes Christians take those passages and apply them carte blanche to any and all situations where they are confronted with their own sin.  They commit the common but inexcusable error of informing their philosophy with only a piece of what God has said about a topic instead of considering additional information He has provided in scripture.  Jesus was not condemning all forms of judging in the Matthew passage.  He was making the point that judging others while at the same time ignoring your own sin is foolishness (see Romans 2:1-11).  Nor was He excusing the sin of the adulterous woman in John.  In fact, if one continues to read the John passage, in verse 11 He tells her to stop sinning herself.

In both cases what Jesus was really doing was confronting the Pharisees' with the truth that they condescendingly judged others while wallowing in their own systematic and unrepentant sin.  The issue with the Pharisaical judging was not the act of judging itself but the hypocritical heart attitude behind the judgments!

Contrary to false teaching that all judging is wrong there is most definitely a proper time and place for judgment and confrontation of sin among Christians.  We already know from the preceding passages that hypocritical judgement is sinful.  But biblical truth doesn't stop there.  To obtain a fuller picture there are a multitude of passages we could draw from.  For the sake of brevity I will briefly focus primarily on only two of them: Matthew 18:15 and Galatians 6:1-5.

Matthew 18:15 is part of a larger passage that deals with the proper procedure for confronting sin in a local church body.  For the purposes of this discussion I just want to focus on the instructions in verse 15.  We are clearly advised that confrontation is the correct course of action when a brother's (or sister's) sin is involved. There is no ambiguity here.  In Galatians 6:1-5 Paul continues the brush strokes found in Matthew by explaining that this confrontation must be done in a spirit of gentle love rather than harsh condemnation.

The complete picture that can be drawn from these various passages is twofold.  First, we as individuals must constantly evaluate our own hearts to be sure we have no unconfessed sin in our lives.  The key word there is unconfessed.  As 1 John 1:8 tells us, we all sin.  If we all sin and the act of sinning itself immediately precludes us from ever judging anyone (as misinterpreters of John 8:7 would suggest) then it would be completely illogical and contradictory for Matthew 18:15 and Galatians 6:1 to also instruct us to confront sin when we encounter it.  Since we know that the bible is God's revealed word and God is incapable of error (Psalm 18:30) then we must assume there is a logical explanation for this impasse.  The answer can be found by continuing to read the passage in 1 John.  Verse 9 reveals that sin once confessed is forgiven and the sinner is cleansed from unrighteousness; thereby making them qualified to pass judgment when appropriate.  In fact, after being glorified that is exactly the role children of God will assume in Christ's kingdom (1 Corinthians 6:2-3).

The second component of biblical judging is the attitude carried by the judge.  The aforementioned Galatians 6 passage as well as 2 Timothy 2:24-26 reveal the proper motivation for someone contemplating an act of Christian judgment.  Is the desire to see a brother or sister restored to union with Christ?  Or is it to build oneself up by tearing others down?  Is the love of Jesus toward a sibling in mind as found in John 13:35?  Or is a cold and unfeeling adherence to the letter of the law all that is in view?  The answer to this question will reveal immediately whether you should be confronting sin or possibly getting on your knees in repentance yourself.

On the flip side of the coin, how should we respond when we are on the receiving end of judgment?  How can we know whether the person confronting us is doing so correctly?  And what if we are confronted with anger or hostility rather than compassion and love?  The simple answer is that we shouldn't worry about any of that.  Only God knows the hidden truths contained in man's heart (1 Corinthians 2:11).  And there are a litany of verses that tell us to receive instruction and admonishment with a glad heart.  1 Peter 5:5 takes the view of being approached by one's elder, or one in whom wisdom is found, and listening to their instruction with humility.  2 Timothy 3:16 reminds that one of the functions of scripture is for reproof.  And my personal favorite is found in Proverbs 13:18 where Solomon goes right for the jugular by revealing the stupidity of anyone who dislikes correction.  It could be argued that a hostile confrontation by a brother or sister may need to be confronted itself in the due course of time.  But wisdom and discernment should dictate that this secondary confrontation needs to be handled delicately and separated by some passage of time from the situation to which we are currently involved in.  So rather than wasting time and energy trying to immediately determine if we are being confronted by someone with a clean heart our best course of action is to receive instruction with humility and then join the Holy Spirit in a serious examination of ourselves to root out the possible sin that may be hiding in our inner man.

As David sings in the climactic verses of Psalm 139, the cry of our hearts should be for God to cleanse us from sin by any means necessary.

Don't judge me?  On the contrary, please judge me!

Soli Deo Gloria

Religious Intolerance...In America?

We of the stars and stripes variety of Christian have been very blessed by enjoying tremendous religious freedoms.  Our founding fathers, while arguably not evangelical believers as we would recognize them today, were at the very least Deists.  They believed in one God who created the universe and whose written word was law.  But they and/or their progenitors had come from a European heritage of tremendous religious intolerance.

There was no separation of church and state in the Europe of that day.  The lines were blurred beyond recognition due to a muddy history of politics and power struggles stretching all the way back to the formation of the Papal States and the later crowning of Charlemagne as Holy Roman Emperor by Pope Leo III in the 7th and 8th centuries AD.  So by the time we reach the 16th and 17th centuries the government and the church, in the form of Roman Catholicism (or the Church of England in the case of Great Britain), worked hand in glove to ensure that their subjects could only legally practice the religion officially chosen for them.

This was the environment from which the men who formed our country came.  Thus they created our constitution specifically to prevent the government of the United States from ever interfering with a citizens right to worship in whatever way he or she saw fit as long as it did not impugn the same freedoms afforded to the citizens around them.

But today as we march merrily onward further into the 21st century there are subtle hints of intolerance toward Christianity all around us.  We see it in Chik-Fil-A being attacked because their CEO happened to mention his convictions about same sex marriage.  We see it in Obamacare attempting to force companies such as Hobby Lobby to provide their employees with controversial forms of contraceptives through their insurance policies.  We see it in the decades long slide of liberal media further and further from the biblical standards upon which this country was founded and toward a post-modern world-view which denies the existence of absolute truth.

And today I saw it in the following image of the web page I was greeted with when I attempted to visit www.bible.org while at work.  Please note the bolded words which indicate the reason why my company is blocking my access from this web site.  If you can't make them out just click on the image to enlarge it.

I have to admit that I was initially startled and then shocked by this.  And for the record, my company's code of conduct expressly permits us to surf the Internet while on breaks and/or lunches.

Don't think religious persecution in America is on the horizon?

Wake up...


Soli Deo Gloria

Are You a Dysfunctional Church Member?

This is another post from my personal archives that I wanted to have consolidated on my blog.  It is an essay I wrote in preparation for a lesson I taught at church on a Wednesday evening back in the summer of 2011.  I hope it will be of use to someone now.  I present it here almost verbatim from its original printing.  The only changes are that I have added two or three words as I read back over it and I updated the ages of my children.  

                                       

What is the church and how is it to function?  These questions have been wrestled with by theologians and scholars for centuries.  In the church age following Pentecost history has born witness to a bevy of interpretations and applications of the New Testament teaching on this subject: house churches planted and/or presided over by the Apostles, secretive fellowships assembled under the threat of state sanctioned persecution, powerful political organisms with first the backing of the government and then the outright assumption of the operation of the government, military organizations tasked with self righteous proselytizing campaigns, groups of explorers seeking religious freedom, and glorified “extra-curricular activity clubs” with crosses on the windows and locks on the doors.  Through all of these radically different interpretations of the church what has been the interactions between its members?  What have Christians seen as their responsibilities to the local body of which they are a member?

A complete discourse on all of the different aspects of a local church is beyond the scope of this article.  Instead we will look at just one item; that of the church’s correlation to both the form and the function of a biological family unit and an individual believer’s role in that unit.

The title of this essay includes a word with mostly negative connotations in our modern American culture.  When we think of dysfunctional families images of abused spouses, neglected children, and broken homes come to mind.  A case could be made that many modern churches in the United States bear a striking similarity to that description.  However, for the purposes of this paper we will stick with the basic definition of dysfunction.  Merriam-Webster says it this way; impaired or abnormal functioning.  Dictionary.com uses the word malfunction to get its point across.  A third definition that is more relevant to this subject is; operation that is contrary to the intended function of the designer.  But before we can determine if we as believers are indeed operating in a dysfunctional manner in the area of familial interactions we must first define the correct implementation as conceived by God and revealed in His word.  This examination will focus on two key concepts.  First is a believer’s status as an adopted child of God.  Second is that believer’s expected relationship and responsibility to others of God’s adopted children.

Adoption into the family of God

Adoption is a familiar term in our society.  Most of us know of at least one case of adoption either in our own family or our circle of friends.  It is also a common word in many Christian circles.  We learn about it along with regeneration, conversion, justification and several other words ending in “shun.”  But does the theological application of such a familiar expression mean what we think it does?  For the answer to this we will look at Romans 8:14-17.

In verse 14 of chapter 8 we read “for all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God.”  Immediately we are presented with the fact that to be guided by the Holy Spirit is to automatically be a child of God.  But Paul, the author of Romans, doesn’t stop there. 

He goes on in verse 15 to say “For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, "Abba! Father!"  Note the contrast here between slavery (i.e. to sin) and adoption as well as between the lower case “s” of the spirit of slavery and the capital “S” of the Spirit of adoption.  No longer are we to be helpless servitors to the taint of sin.  Instead we are brought into a new loving family of freedom and joy.  In addition, this Spirit of adoption that we receive is not an impersonal force or principle.  It is a real living person of the Godhead who accomplishes our spiritual acceptance into the family of God.  As we go from orphans to treasured children we also go from impersonal to personal.  And in the phrase “by whom we cry, Abba! Father!” we see that it is through the enablement of this personal Spirit who we receive that we are able to respond to the Father in love.

Thus we must conclude that it is the Spirit of God who is the facilitator that makes this adoption possible.  We read in verse 16 “The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God.  The obvious conclusion both here and back in verse 14 is that if the Holy Spirit is not within us providing guidance and communion then there is no evidence of our status as children.  Furthermore, verse 17 reveals “and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ.”  So not only are we children, but we have an inheritance promised to us.  Because of this guarantee we can confidently look forward to that time in which our birthright comes to its full measure.

A good friend recently reminded me of a very important point regarding adoption that can be found in Ephesians 5:1.  “Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children”.  Synonyms for the word that is here translated as beloved include esteemed, dear, and favorite.  From this we must acknowledge that it is not an indifferent or uncaring attitude which God shows toward those He has adopted.  Our relationship with our heavenly father is one where He displays intense love and devotion to us.  We in turn should show complete and utter adoration back to Him out of boundless love and thanks for what He has done for us.

The biblical answer to the question of spiritual adoption is clear.  We are indeed honored and beloved children of the living God.  We are co-heirs with Christ and each other of an inheritance that Peter calls imperishable, undefiled, and unfading. (cf. 1 Pet. 1:4)

Relationship to others in God’s family

If we accept the truth of our position as adopted children of God what then should be our view of others who bear the same status?  What is our bond with them in the eyes of God?

To determine this we must define these fellow image bearers and heirs with Christ.  The Greek word that is trans-literated as adelphos is found approximately 350 times in the New Testament.  In the majority of those instances it is used as a form of address between Christians.  (cf. Rom. 7:1, Jam. 1:2, Heb. 3:12)  The remainder of the occurrences are split between referring to a biological brother and a friend or fellow countryman.  Therefore we can say with some certainty that the authors of the New Testament regarded fellow Christians with the same level of affection as a literal sibling, a close friend, or both.

This evidence can be added to with an extensive list of calls to show sacrificial love to one another as brothers.  Jesus commanded His followers to love one another as a form of evangelism when He said “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.  By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”  Paul brings out that God Himself is our teacher in his first letter to the church at Thessalonica when he said “for you yourselves have been taught by God to love one another.”  The apostle Peter gives a further view of love between believers similar to what is expressed between affectionate siblings when he says “Having purified your souls by your obedience to the truth for a sincere brotherly love, love one another earnestly from a pure heart.”  Finally, in his first epistle John takes this concept to an even greater level by drawing a correlation between the love we are expected to show fellow Christians and the willingness to sacrifice His own life that Christ demonstrated; “By this we know love, that He laid down His life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers.” (cf. John 13:34-35, 1 Thess. 4:9, 1 Pet. 1:22, 1 John 3:16)

According to the biblical record Christians are truly brothers (and sisters) to each other.  This is so in every sense of the word: biological, as close friends, and as fellow countrymen of the kingdom of God. (cf. Matt. 7:21, John 3:5) Not only do we share this status, but we do so in the best sense of every form of the word.  We are to be brothers (and sisters!) who have a deep and abiding love for one another and who are willing to put others first.  We are to form intimate friendships that go far beyond the superficial into the realm of lifetime best friends.  And we are called to stand together just as people do who share a profound sense of national identity and loyalty.

The Church as a Family Unit

We have looked at our individual status as adopted children of God and at our obligation to show brotherly love toward other believers.  But what does that look like when applied to an entire local church body?  How is the church to function in light of these truths?  There are two primary effects that should be caused by a group of redeemed people working together who are both conscious of their adopted status and desire to demonstrate the love of Christ to one another; unity and growth.

Unity is defined by secular dictionaries as the state of being one or a condition of harmony.  In many cases this is accomplished in the world of business and politics through the vehicle of compromise.  At the time of this writing news networks are carrying exhaustive coverage of the efforts in Washington, D.C. to increase the national debt limit in order to avoid defaulting on our financial obligations.  The story is one of two political parties, convinced they are in the right, neither willing to give ground unless it is forced out of them proverbially kicking and screaming.  In opposition to this worldly view of an attempt to achieve unity we have the biblical definition which is both more appealing and more practical. 

In Ephesians 4:1-3 we read; “I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.”  We will break this passage down by looking at it backwards.  Paul’s admonition here is to strive for “the unity of the Spirit.”  Thus the bible’s brand of unity places God front and center in the fulcrum position on which the whole thing hinges.  Unity in the body of Christ cannot be accomplished without all parties involved understanding up front that whatever is accomplished must be done so by operating out of the fullness of the Holy Spirit who indwells us.  The next significant phrase is “in the bond of peace.”  The key driver for this sought after unity is “the peace of God which surpasses all understanding.” (cf. Phil. 4:7)  The idea here is that of complete surrender to the Lordship of God in our lives.  This frees us from the burden of stressing over events.  We acknowledge that all things are in His hands, including interpersonal relationships within the body, and He will give us over to a peace unknown to those who are slaves to sin.  But this is not to indicate that unity is accomplished through a hands-off approach which says to “let go and let God.”  In the same way that biblical sanctification is a co-operation between the Holy Spirit and a Christian, unity is achieved through both the peace of God and a familiar concept from the previous section; “bearing with one another in love.”  Once again we see love rise to the forefront of importance.  But lest we forget the never failing practicality of God’s word Paul doesn't stop with a nebulous reference to an undefined or generalist love.  He goes on to give us some concrete tools that we can practically use on a daily basis: “humility, gentleness, and patience.”  So from this passage we can biblically define unity as follows: A peaceful union born of the Spirit, accomplished by love, and carried out by humility, gentleness, and patience.

The second item in our exploration of the biblical operation of the church is that of growth.  Growth can be stated as a gradual increase through a series of stages of development.  Often the image that comes to mind is that of the development of the human body from birth to childhood to adolescence to adulthood.  Therefore we unconsciously tend to equate growth with size.  Because of this tendency care must be exercised here to avoid tying church growth to the physical size of the membership rolls.  Just as escaping hell is a side benefit of salvation but not the item of greatest importance, physical expansion of a local church body is a side benefit that sometimes occurs when true biblical growth is realized.  This is a common misconception in Christian circles.

For the purposes of this discussion we will define biblical church growth as having two components of greatest significance.

1. A membership that is growing in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. (cf. 2 Pet. 3:18)
2. A membership who has a desire for the word of God to increase and the number of disciples to multiply greatly. (cf. Acts 6:7) Note: The key here is the spread of the gospel and the glory it brings to God through the hearts and lives He changes.  A potential increase in numbers is only relevant as a greater testimony of God’s grace and mercy.

With this working definition and criterion of growth in a local church in place it is time to look at how this plays out in a biblical context.  Ephesians 4:15-16 reads “Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into Him who is the head, into Christ, from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love.”  The following simple diagram may help to visualize how this process works.

Of note here is the repeated emphasis once again on the aspect of love.  It is simply inescapable that God’s intended design of the church as an organism is predicated upon, integral to, and hopeless without biblical brotherly love.

Based upon the preceding evidence the conclusion is that a local church must be committed to unity and growth.  They are intertwined beyond the ability of man to untangle.  The unity of peace in the Holy Spirit leads to the continued maturation of the knowledge of Jesus in the body of Christ and the ever increasing desire to proclaim His name among the nations, tied together by the bond of sacrificial love.

The Dysfunction of the Church (Member?)

Having identified the proper biblical model for productive and healthy churches we need to examine whether we are consistent with it.  But do we do this on the congregational or the individual level?  Attempting to assess the health of an entire local church may not be the best use of our time for two reasons: it would be difficult to identify a reliable method of determining overall church health, and the example set by Jesus in the Gospels was to examine one’s own heart before looking anywhere else. (cf. Matt. 7:3)

If we take it to a personal level; and given the preceding arguments for how the members of a local church are expected to relate to each other and the resulting unity and growth that will occur when that happens, the question we must ask ourselves is this.  Does each of us as individuals look like a church member that is described in the New Testament?  More to the point, are our inter-personal relationships at church equal to or better than our relationships with our biological siblings?  I would submit that in many cases our honest answer must be no.  I believe this is due to either one or both of two primary reasons.  We fail to properly appreciate our position as adopted and beloved children.  And we fail to truly see our fellows at church as more than brothers and sisters.

Most of us are not legally adopted according to the laws of the United States.  We were born into a family, and despite particular challenges or imperfections we have always had that sense of identity ingrained within us.  So when the Holy Spirit regenerates our hearts and we respond in faith and repentance we already have a position as a son or daughter.  This conflicts with our ability to truly comprehend the magnificence of our new position in Christ.  The theology of adoption is taught and we both receive it and understand it, but there is great difficulty in allowing this truth to penetrate deeply into our spirits to the point where not only do we know we are truly beloved but we live as if we are truly beloved.

I am reminded of a true story I read of a Russian girl.  She grew up in a town in northern Russia and had many happy memories as a small child.  But then her life turned upside down.  She witnessed her father being beaten to death by an unknown assailant who was never caught.  Her mother turned to prostitution in an attempt to feed her family.  As a result this young girl was often left alone for days at a time to care for both herself and her younger brother.  Her innocence and childhood were stripped away and she was faced with a grim future.  But one day a Christian couple visited the orphanage where she and her brother had lived since being removed from their mother’s home.  This couple adopted the pair and brought them home to live in America.  Overnight the world was changed for these children.  For the first time in years they had a loving family that cared for them and welcomed them into their home.

I believe in many ways this account mirrors our own spiritual experience.  We are born into, the bible says, a slavery to sin.  We are dead and lost, with no loving spiritual father to care for us and welcome us into His home.  But then in a miraculous turn of events our world is irrevocably altered and out of the blue we are given the most incredible gift imaginable.  It is a gift of such magnitude that we struggle to fully comprehend it.  We experience the affection of the true and living God for his dearly beloved children for the first time in our lives.  And this is a perfect love with no hint of imperfection such as we undoubtedly experienced from our biological father.

Unfortunately, for many Christians I believe this is not as real as it could be.  The Father’s adoption of us is taken for granted.  As a result we fail to appreciate our position in Christ and our responsibilities to others of His children.

A further nail in the coffin of our ability to function like adopted children is our physical maturation.  Most people lose the childlike sense of wonder they once had as they grow into adulthood.  We are no longer fascinated by “puppy dogs!” and overjoyed by playing in the rain.  We become desensitized to the awe of a creation that surrounds us and cries out the glory of the Lord with every morning.  In many cases this maturation is right and appropriate as there are certain things children do and say that would be offensive coming from an adult.  But I believe that in one area it is a tremendous disadvantage to have lost such innocence; in our view of God.

My son is 12 years old and my daughter is 4.  So I had several years prior to her birth to forget the experience of having a small child in the home.  Thus it was particularly striking to be reminded of what it means to see the world through the eyes of a little girl.  This forgotten view of life is realized in the joyful abandon she experiences when I come home and she screams “Daddy!” and runs to greet me as fast as she can.  Or the fear she experiences during a severe thunderstorm as she clutches my arm and I hold her close.  I see this mirrored in scripture.  Earlier we looked at Romans 8:15.  No longer do we need to be afraid of the spiritual thunderstorm of slavery to sin because we are safe and secure in the loving arms of our father.  And this Father is stronger than any storm of life.  We can express all the rapturous and respectful adoration of a child when we cry out “Abba! Father!” to a Lord who is infinitely worthy of all our love.  Too often this is not our response when we consider Him.  Our children have much to teach us if we would only listen.

In addition to an adoption that is taken for granted I believe we often do not view our relationship with fellow church members as we should.  There are a variety of different manifestations of this, influenced both by personality and upbringing.  Perhaps we do not feel comfortable initiating conversations so we rarely inquire how someone is doing spiritually.  Or maybe we resist proper biblical Christian judgment so we close ourselves off in an attempt to avoid it.  Other times we establish close relationships with a core group at our church and then gradually cease to reach out to others who may be in need or hurting.  We might have gone through a painful division at a church in our past and so we now refuse to get close to anyone for fear of experiencing the pain of separation again.  In some cases we may be guilty of apathy.  It may not be that we don’t care about our siblings in Christ but we don’t care enough.  We don’t care enough to help with our time or finances when they are in need.  We don’t care enough to sacrifice an evening of our week in order to host someone at our home.

There are as many different examples as there are personalities among humans.  Not all are applicable to all people.  And often there may be extenuating circumstances such as an unsaved spouse which prevents us from fully manifesting the love of Christ to those around us.  But aside from those caveats if the view and the effort we place on our relationships at church do not accurately model biblical church relationships then we fail to operate as a family or a body the way God designed it.  And if once we become aware of our deficiency we refuse to act upon it then it becomes outright sin.

Healing the Family

In spite of this grim diagnosis we have much to rejoice over.  Our Lord has provided us with a handbook that details exactly how to live and interact with our brethren in Christ; the bible!  As outlined earlier in this article there are multiple factors that play into how a local church functions as a family.  But I believe the essential building block is relationships.  It is relationships that will place us in close proximity to other like minded disciples of Jesus and promote spiritual maturation through the collective study of God’s word.  It is relationships that help us to notice when someone is hurting and needs a friend.  Without the interactions that come from being close to another person we are less likely to notice when they are in sin so that we will have the opportunity to gently and lovingly reprove them.  We will be less likely to remember to pray for someone we barely know.  Only a close personal friendship with another believer will generate the necessary level of accountability that I believe God has designed into His church for the purpose of providing us with assistance in battling our flesh.  And it is only through Christian relationships within our individual local family church that we will have opportunity to work together to promote the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace which leads to the growth of the gospel of Jesus Christ and the exaltation of His great name.

All of that being said, forming and nurturing relationships is easier for some than for others.  Factors such as personality type, past history, common interests or lack thereof all come into play at times to prevent us from seeking out the companionship of our brothers and sisters.  But much like the process of progressive sanctification changes don’t occur overnight.  We must begin to take steps to rectify deficiencies in our relational life within the body of Christ.  This can begin with something as simple as determining to have one meaningful interaction each time you are at church.  Start small and work your way up.  God works through processes throughout His word and in the experiences of our lives.  His processes can sometimes be painful or uncomfortable.  But they are always for our ultimate benefit and His glory.  So why would we expect an area such as this to be any different?

On the other hand, if you are someone who excels at building friendships then there is a special opportunity for ministry to those who struggle in this area.  Seek them out!  Look for those who seem to be on the fringes of social circles.  Keep an eye out for the folks who usually arrive late to church and leave early.  There may be an opportunity there to reach someone who is blinded by the lies their flesh is telling them.  These lies can take many forms such as “people won’t like me”, “I don’t know enough”, “I don’t want people prying into my personal life”, or “I don’t want to be hurt again.”  In opposition to these falsehoods is the truth that we are the beloved children of our heavenly Father.  Sometimes people just need a friend to point out to them the fallacy in their thinking.  But although this is a form of ministering be careful not to treat others as a ministry project.  The key is to pray that the Lord would give each and every one of us a genuine desire to connect with people in a deep and meaningful way.  The ministry will flow from these personal connections, not the other way around.

To recap, there is much we can do to correct dysfunctional behavior once it has been identified.  The following list is just a start but it may be of help in forming a plan:

• First, acknowledge and act upon the fact that all must be accomplished in and through the Holy Spirit. (cf. Gal. 5:16-18)
• Seek to live out the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. (cf. Eph. 4:3)
• Consider inter-personal relationships among the body of Christ as ministry opportunities but don’t view people as projects. (cf. Heb. 10:24-25)
• Look for people on the fringes of social circles and seek out interactions to draw them into fellowship. (cf. Acts 4:32a)
• Show hospitality to members of the body (cf. 1 Pet. 4:9)
• Actively work to reconcile those who have strayed into sin. (cf. Gal. 6:1)
• Forgive others and do not harbor resentment. (cf. Eph. 4:31-32)
• Use as your tools the fruits of the Spirit (cf. Gal. 5:22)
• Above all, display the love of Christ to your fellows (cf. 1 Cor. 13:1-3)

 These ideas and others can help to set us on a course that will lead to being more productive members of a healthier local church body.  Whatever specific methods are chosen by each individual believer if they are pursued with a steadfast devotion to lift up the name of God half the battle is already won.  To coin an old phrase, “be part of the solution not part of the problem.”


Soli Deo Gloria