Lies

A lament for the lies

That have poisoned the minds

Twisted the souls

Corrupted the design

It began in the Garden

With a pernicious question

Did God really say?

Do you ask it still today?

A lament for the lies

To our girls and our boys

Perverted the unity

Intended to reflect trinity

Men are to dominate

Might will make right

Women are objects

For the bedroom at night

A lament for the lies

To our sons and our daughters

Reversed their roles

Split them asunder

Males are buffoons

Best keep them from rule

Females are better

Fit the man with fetters

A lament for the lies

That have polluted our churches

Filled up the pews

With spiritual corpses

Come and taste me

The world, it pleads

And with our mouths we bring praise

While our actions, malaise

author unimportant

Every Parking Lot a Mission Field

I would like to tell you a story.  It’s about two men, a savior, and a parking lot.  This story is about fear, courage, and submission.  It’s about spiritual warfare.  It’s about fitting one’s feet with the shoes of the gospel of peace, throwing the belt of truth around one’s waist, firmly fastening the breastplate of righteousness and the helmet of salvation to one’s body, raising the shield of faith to deflect the arrows of Satan, and finally counter-attacking with the sword of the spirit which is the word of God.  This story is about doing all of the above and then marching boldly behind the power of God to hurl our attack straight into the jaws of the enemy, who “prowls around like a roaring lion seeking someone to devour.”  Do you consider yourself too old or too sophisticated for stories?  I earnestly hope not.  Let me begin.

As I walked outside through the door of a local restaurant this afternoon, I held it open for the man behind me.  As we proceeded together into the parking lot, he said “It sure is warmer here than where I live.”  Immediately my natural inclination flared to life in my brain.  You see, I am not at all a social person.  I have learned to overcome this in some situations, such as at church or at work.  But still, my default mode of operation is to be silent and withdrawn.  So when this man made his statement my immediate disposition was to make some sort of friendly but terse response and then head to my car to leave.  But something stopped me.  I sensed this was an opportunity for conversation.  And although conversations with strangers are one of my least favorite activities, my Lord and savior Jesus Christ, has commanded me to make disciples.  I cannot make a disciple without witnessing to someone about Jesus through conversation, because the word of God says “How then will they call on Him in whom they have not believed?  How will they believe in Him whom they have not heard?  And how will they hear without a preacher?  How will they preach unless they are sent?  Just as it is written, “How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news of good things!”  So I swallowed my initial response and began to engage this man in conversation.

            I learned that he was from Rainelle.  He is an older man, 61, and complained of problems with his shoulders.  He shared with me that he takes care of his elderly mother, who has some level of mental deterioration and cannot care for herself.  We commiserated together about how our bodies break down all too quickly and when we were younger we did not appreciate this fact. 

At two points in the conversation I attempted to drop “bait” in the “water” by mentioning the bible and the name of Jesus.  My bait went unnoticed.  He gave no response whatsoever.  So I thought to myself “He’s either ignoring me on purpose or it went over his head.”  I could see the potential for my opportunity to slip away, as it has done so many other times due to my own lack of courage.  I could feel the tugging of my flesh urging me to let it go and get on with my day.  But how can I call myself a Christian, which literally means “little Christ”, if I don’t act like Christ?  And do we ever see Jesus shrinking from an opportunity to preach repentance and the coming of the kingdom of God to those He encountered?  I think not!  So with these thoughts flying through my brain at about Mach 5, and desperate to not once again fail my Lord as I have done so many times before, I decided to throw my ridiculous caution to the wind and go for broke.  After all, I reasoned, I will most likely never see this man again so what have I got to lose and why in the world am I hesitating?  So I plunged in and asked him if I could pray for him.  He said yes, the next time I prayed I could pray for him and his mom.  I told him I prayed every day and then I asked him if he had a relationship with Jesus Christ.

This simple and direct question, only eight words, opened the floodgates.  He began to talk about what I recognized as a very cultural perception of being right with God by doing good deeds and being moral.  He spoke about how he worries too much and becomes frantic in trying to care for his mother.  I was able to assure him that, although Jesus never promised that we would have easy lives, he did promise that we would experience peace through knowing Him.  And more importantly, I warned this man that unless he and his mother do have a relationship with Christ, they are under the wrath of God because of their sin.  I asked him if he had a bible in his home.  When he responded in the affirmative, I encouraged him to read the gospel of John.  He asked me to have my pastor pray for him.  I assured him that I would do more than that; I would have my entire church pray for him and I would be praying for him daily.  He allowed me to pray with him right there in the parking lot and accepted my telephone number which I encouraged him to use.

So my friends, I have three instructions for you, if you are willing to receive them.

1.       Don’t you dare think positive thoughts about me.  This was not about me, it was about Jesus Christ and the power of the Holy Spirit at work in me.  As I described, something as simple as having a 10 minute conversation is a major hurdle for me to overcome.  But truly “I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.”

2.       Please know that if you struggle to share your faith you are not alone.  We are all in this together and many of us share the same or similar struggles.  But through the process of being sanctified by obedience (please don’t miss that underscore; although God granted the increase Paul and Apollos were still held responsible for planting and watering) you can experience the joy that comes from being a dutiful child of your heavenly Father and you can know that “the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

3.       Please pray for Wayne Ayres, the man I met today.  His mother’s name is Laurie.  Pray that he will take my advice to read the gospel of John.  Pray that he will call me.  Above all pray that he will come to know the Lord.  Wayne desperately needs to be justified before God through the righteousness of Christ, as do all those who do not have a saving relationship with Jesus.

Let us together become a mighty army before the Lord.  You can do this!  I would be delighted to speak with anyone who needs encouragement, a spare shoulder to cry on, or a ready foot to kick you in the backside when necessary!  Peace and grace to you through God the father and our Lord Jesus Christ.

Nothing And Everything

All followers of Christ should have certain core values.  These are the philosophies, practices, and truths which together define the foundation of our worldview, or the manner in which we perceive the world around us; both the events that transpire and the nature or shape of reality which causes those events.  One such core value is Integrity.  The Elders of Daniels Bible Church have chosen to define this as “a discipline of life presented in the Scriptures, modeled by Christ, and empowered by the Holy Spirit, in order that we become blameless in all things.”  That sounds real nice, but what does it actually mean and how does one go about practicing it? 

            The answer to the first part of that question is hidden in the definition of Integrity that we are using.  The key word to focus upon is “blameless.”  It is by being blameless that we can prove our integrity.  Webster’s dictionary defines blameless as “free from guilt”.  Immediately a problem should present itself.  How can we possibly be free from guilt when every single day our own sin convicts us?  Perhaps if we had a day or two here and there that were free from sin we might possibly be able to get a grip on this elusive blamelessness.  Unfortunately, God’s word assures us that will not happen.  1 John 2:5 puts it this way; “If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.”  “Great”, we might be prone to think sarcastically, “The bible itself tells me I’m a liar if I say that I don’t sin, sin convicts me of guilt in the court room of God, and blamelessness requires me to be free from guilt.  Therefore I’m hopelessly incapable of ever being blameless and thus it is impossible for me to have integrity.  I might as well give up and stop trying.”

            If we were to think thoughts such as these we would be partially correct, but only partially.  We would be correct in the sense that we might as well give up trying to acquire integrity and blamelessness on our own.  Isaiah 64:6 makes it clear that “all our righteous deeds are like a polluted garment.”  Instead of relying on ourselves to live a blame free life we must look outside of us to the one who already did live a blame free life; the person of Jesus Christ.  Romans 3:21-22 reveals the key to our dilemma: “But now apart from the Law the righteousness of God has been manifested, being witnessed by the Law and the Prophets, even the righteousness of God through faith in Jesus Christ for all those who believe;” It is Christ’s perfect righteousness which is laid on our accounts in the sight of God at the moment we express the faith He has given us through the action of belief.  This is called justification and it is the only way to become restored to a right relationship with God.

            But we’re not discussing salvation here.  We were talking about integrity.  The truth of justification by faith in Jesus, apart from works of the law, helps us to understand how to become blameless in the first place and therefore, with the definition being used here, to have integrity.  But that doesn’t seem to help figure out how to practice this integrity on a daily basis.  In fact, it actually sounds like practicing integrity is irrelevant, since we are already seen by God as blameless.  Paul puts it this way in Romans 6:1: “What shall we say then?  Are we to continue in sin so that grace may increase?”  Said another way, our sins have been covered by Christ’s righteousness, we are already justified in God’s sight, so practical Christian living has nothing to do with any kind of practice of a blameless life full of integrity.  Luckily for us, Paul answers his own rhetorical question immediately in the next verse with the following words: “May it never be!”  And he elucidates further in verses 8-12 of the same chapter.  “Now if we have died with Christ, we believe that we shall also live with Him, knowing that Christ, having been raised from the dead, is never to die again; death no longer is master over Him.  For the death that He died, He died to sin once for all; but the life that He lives, He lives to God.  Even so consider yourselves to be dead to sin, but alive to God in Christ Jesus.  Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its lusts.”  It is a fallacy born of twisting Paul’s words to say that we don’t need to live lives characterized by integrity simply because we have the righteousness of Christ “in the bank.”  The truth is that the righteousness given to us freely as a gift and a life characterized by the evidence of that gift go hand in hand.  You can’t have one without the other.  Anyone who claims that you can is under a satanic delusion that is not consistent with the word of God.

            At ths point someone may say “Ok, ok, ok, enough already!  You’ve convinced me that integrity means blamelessness and I can be counted as blameless and thus as having integrity through faith in Christ.  But you still haven’t answered the second half of the original question; namely, how in the world do I go about practicing this?  Because I sure don’t see much of this evidence of blamelessness when I look in the mirror.  In fact, what I see is failure after failure after failure.  What you’re telling me I already have and what I see in my own life are not jiving at all.”

            The answer to this dilemma is really very simple...

Integrity has nothing to do with the magnitude of your failures, and it has everything to do with the sincerity of your repentances.

            In retrospect this should be obvious.  If justification is granted as a free gift apart from any works that we do, and if being justified grants us righteousness, blamelessness, and thus integrity, then it stands to reason that the living out of that should have very little to do with us.  I say very little because, although as Jesus said in Matthew 11:30 “My yoke is easy, and My burden is light.”, the yoke and burden is still there.  We are still required to be obedient.  But the obedience God asks of us is not born of our striving unto perfection.  Rather it is born of our sorrow and broken-heartedness over the sin that we see when we gaze at our corrupted reflection in the mirror.  This grief will be present in the heart of one who is truly born again with the spirit of almighty God living within them.  And it will absolutely cause a person to have an attitude of repentance which serves not as the means by which we obtain righteousness, blamelessness, and integrity but as the evidence that we have already been given them.

            That is how we are to practice integrity on a personal basis.  But is there another dimension of the human condition upon which these principles operate?  Yes, and it is called spiritual leadership.  When we demonstrate integrity as a proof of the righteousness and blamelessness of Christ which has been granted to us, what we are really doing is demonstrating leadership.  

            Obviously this principle applies to a husband and/or father fulfilling his role as the spiritual leader of his family.  But it has a broader application and extension to Christians from all walks of life because every believer, at some point, in some fashion, and to some degree, will be called upon to lead another human being in a spiritual capacity.  It could be an older child with younger siblings.  Or perhaps an employer with his or her employees.  Maybe a mother “training up her children in the way they should go.”  Possibly a teenager in the midst of a Christian culture increasingly seduced by the attractive façade of sin that permeates our society.  Alternatively, an authentic disciple of Christ who has an unbelieving spouse.  Or even just an older Christian who Titus charges to disciple younger ones. Regardless of your socio-economic position, if you are a follower of Jesus you will be called upon eventually to model spiritual leadership.  And when that call comes in what will be primarily put to the test is not your wit, charm, or teaching ability.  It will be your integrity that comes under the microscope, modeled here by the twin facets of blamelessness and righteousness.

            And there-in often lies our problem.  Our contorted and self-centered minds, even as believers, are often the victims of the lies spewed out by the “god of this age” (2 Cor. 4:4), the “ancient serpent, who is called the devil and Satan, the deceiver of the whole world” (Rev. 12:9).  In this case Satan will gleefully tell you that because you just completely blew it and sinned your filthy little heart out, you have no business providing leadership in the context for which it is relevant for you.  He will plant a seed of doubt.  A nagging little voice that says you’re not worthy.  An unbiblical and self-pitying conviction that you should abdicate your God-given responsibility to lead others and allow someone better qualified to take the reins.  And it is in those times of self-doubt and self-recrimination that we must learn to brand the point of this essay upon our hearts.  Again:

Integrity has nothing to do with the magnitude of your failures, and it has everything to do with the sincerity of your repentances.

            Christ Himself bought and paid for your soul on the cross.  The will of God has sovereignly placed you where He desires to use you.  And are you so small minded and self-oriented that you honestly believe that your particular flavor of sinning somehow circumvents, nullifies, or invalidates God’s choice of you to be His adopted child?  Wake up!  It’s not about you and your sin.  It’s not about you and your failures.  It’s not about how you don’t measure up.  It’s not about how others are better equipped.  If you could see inside their hearts and behind the closed doors of their homes I absolutely guarantee that you would see a tapestry of failure just as epic in scope and broad in extent as your own.  Stop making much of yourself and your part in this and start making much of God and His power which will work in and through you.

            As stated earlier, I am not saying we should gloss over our sinful failures.  On the contrary, I am advocating that we acknowledge them in the most decisive and effective method available; namely a change of mind followed by a change of action that the Bible calls genuine repentance.  Practicing this on a daily basis will result in your life becoming a model of righteous, blameless, and integrity filled spiritual leadership that will influence, impact, and exhort the people around you by pointing them to Christ through your example.

On Death Row For Christ

                Right now, approximately 7,400 miles from Daniels West Virginia, it is around 8pm in the city of Lahore, Pakistan.  44 kilometers away (about 27 miles) in Sheikhupura sits an ancient prison.  Inside, in a cell measuring 8 by 10 feet, a 47 year old woman has been living in solitary confinement for the last five years after being arrested on June 19, 2009.  Her name is Aasiya Noreen Bibi.  She is allowed out of her cell for 30 minutes per day and is permitted a one hour visit per week from her family, consisting of a husband and five children.  Aasiya is on death row, convicted by a local judge in November 2010 of blasphemy and sentenced to death by hanging.  After her conviction Aasiya’s case was immediately appealed to the high court of Lahore and she has been waiting ever since through repeated delays.

                What would cause the high court to delay for so long and so consistently?  You see, Aasiya and her family are Christians in a country where only 1.8% of the population of 186,000,000 share their faith.  In their home village of Ittan Wali they were one of only three Christian families out of 1,500.  And it was in this village where Aasiya’s troubles began.  

In her own words (WARNING - mild language is contained in the following):

That morning I got up earlier than usual, to take part in the big falsa-berry harvest. I’d been told about it by Farah, our lovely local shopkeeper. “Why don’t you go falsa picking tomorrow in that field just outside the village? You know the one; it belongs to the Nadeems, the rich family who live in Lahore. The pay is 250 rupees (ed. this is just over four U.S. dollars).”

Because it was Sunday, my husband Ashiq wasn’t working in the brickworks. While I was getting ready to go to work he was still fast asleep in the big family bed with two of our daughters, who were also worn out after a long week at school. I looked at them with love before I left the room, and thanked God for giving me such a wonderful family.

When I got to the field, around 15 women were already at work, picking away, their backs hidden by the tall bushes. It was going to be a physically exhausting day in such heat, but I needed those 250 rupees.

Some of the women greeted me with a smile. I recognized my neighbor, Musarat, who was the seamstress in my village. I gave her a little wave, but she turned back to the bushes again at once. Musarat wasn’t really an agricultural worker and I didn’t often see her in the fields, so I realized times must be hard for her family. In the end, it was just our lot to be poor, all of us.

A hard-faced woman dressed in clothes that had been mended many times came over to me with an old yellow bowl.

“If you fill the bowl you get 250 rupees,” she said without really looking at me.

I looked at the huge bowl and thought I would never finish before sunset. Looking at the other women’s bowls, I also realized mine was much bigger. They were reminding me that I’m a Christian.

The sun was beating down, and by midday it was like working in an oven. I was dripping with sweat and I could hardly think or move for the suffocating heat. In my mind, I could see the river beside my village. If only I could have jumped into that cool water!

But since the river was nowhere near, I freed myself from my bushes and walked over to the nearby well. Already I could sense the coolness rising up from the depths.

I pull up a bucketful of water and dip in the old metal cup resting on the side of the well. The cool water is all I can think of. I gulp it down and I feel better; I pull myself together.

Then I start to hear muttering. I pay no attention and fill the cup again, this time holding it out to a woman next to me who looks like she’s in pain. She smiles and reaches out . . . At exactly the moment Musarat pokes her ferrety nose out from the bush, her eyes full of hate:

“Don’t drink that water, it’s haram!”

Musarat addresses all the pickers, who have suddenly stopped work at the sound of the word “haram,” the Islamic term for anything forbidden by God.

“Listen, all of you, this Christian has dirtied the water in the well by drinking from our cup and dipping it back several times. Now the water is unclean and we can’t drink it! Because of her!”

It’s so unfair that for once I decide to defend myself and stand up to the old witch.

“I think Jesus would see it differently from Mohammed.”

Musarat is furious. “How dare you think for the Prophet, you filthy animal!”

Three other women start shouting even louder.

“That’s right, you’re just a filthy Christian! You’ve contaminated our water and now you dare speak for the Prophet! Stupid bitch, your Jesus didn’t even have a proper father, he was a bastard, don’t you know that.”

Musarat comes over as though she’s going to hit me and yells: “You should convert to Islam to redeem yourself for your filthy religion.”

I feel a pain deep inside. We Christians have always stayed silent: We’ve been taught since we were babies never to say anything, to keep quiet because we’re a minority. But I’m stubborn too and now I want to react, I want to defend my faith. I take a deep breath and fill my lungs with courage.

“I’m not going to convert. I believe in my religion and in Jesus Christ, who died on the cross for the sins of mankind. What did your Prophet Mohammed ever do to save mankind? And why should it be me that converts instead of you?”

That’s when the hatred bursts from all sides. All around me the women start screaming. One of them grabs my bowl and tips the berries into her own. Another one shoves and Musarat spits in my face with all the scorn she can manage. A foot lashes out and they push me. Even when I run home, I can still hear them complaining.

Five days later, I went to work fruit picking in another field. I’ve almost filled my bowl when I hear what sounds like a rioting crowd. I step back from my bush, wondering what’s going on, and in the distance I see dozens of men and women striding along towards our field, waving their arms in the air.

I catch the cruel eyes of Musarat. Her expression is self-righteous and full of scorn. I shiver as I suddenly realize that she hasn’t let it go. I can tell she’s out for revenge. The excited crowd are closer now; they are coming into the field and now they’re standing in front of me, threatening and shouting.

“Filthy bitch! We’re taking you back to the village! You insulted our Prophet! You’ll pay for that with your life!”  They all start yelling: “Death! Death to the Christian!”

The angry crowd is pressing closer and closer around me. I’m half lying on the ground when two men grab me by the arms to drag me away. I call out in a desperate, feeble voice:

“I haven’t done anything! Let me go, please! I haven’t done anything wrong!”

Just then someone hits me in the face. My nose really hurts and I’m bleeding. They drag me along, semi-conscious, like a stubborn donkey. I can only submit and pray that it will all stop soon. I look at the crowd, apparently jubilant that I’ve put up so little resistance. I stagger as the blows rain down on my legs, my back and the back of my head. I tell myself that when we get to the village perhaps my sufferings will be over. But when we arrive there it’s worse: there are even more people and the crowd turn more and more aggressive, calling all the louder for my death.

More and more people join the crowd as they push me towards the home of the village headman. I recognize the house — it’s the only one that has a garden with grass growing in it. They throw me to the ground. The village imam speaks to me: 

“I’ve been told you’ve insulted our Prophet. You know what happens to anyone who attacks the holy Prophet Mohammed. You can redeem yourself only by conversion or death.”

“I haven’t done anything! Please! I beg you! I’ve done nothing wrong!”

The qari with his long, well-combed beard, turns to Musarat and the three women who were there on the day of the falsa harvest.

“Did she speak ill of Muslims and our holy Prophet Mohammed?”

“Yes, she insulted them,” replies Musarat, and the others join in:

“It’s true, she insulted our religion.”

“If you don’t want to die,” says the young mullah, “you must convert to Islam. Are you willing to redeem yourself by becoming a good Muslim?”

Sobbing, I reply:

“No, I don’t want to change my religion. But please believe me, I didn’t do what these women say, I didn’t insult your religion. Please have mercy on me.”

I put my hands together and plead with him. But he is unmoved.

“You’re lying! Everyone says you committed this blasphemy and that’s proof enough. Christians must comply with the law of Pakistan, which forbids any derogatory remarks about the holy Prophet. Since you won’t convert and the Prophet cannot defend himself, we shall avenge him.”

He turns on his heel and the angry crowd falls on me. I’m beaten with sticks and spat at. I think I’m going to die. Then they ask me again:

“Will you convert to a religion worthy of the name?”

“No, please, I’m a Christian, but I beg you . . . ”

And they go on beating me with the same fury as before.

I was barely conscious and could hardly feel the pain of my wounds by the time the police arrived. Two policemen threw me in their van, to cheers from the angry crowd, and a few minutes later I was in the police station in Nankana Sahib.

In the police chief’s office they sat me down on a bench. I asked for water and compresses for the wounds on my legs, which were streaming with blood. A young policeman threw me an old dishcloth and spat out at me:

“Here, and don’t get it everywhere.”

One of my arms really hurt and I thought it might be broken. Just then I saw the qari come in with Musarat and her gang. With me sitting there they told the police chief that I insulted the Prophet Mohammed. From outside the police station I could hear shouts:

“Death to the Christian!”

After writing up the report the policeman turned and called to me in a nasty voice:

“So what have you got to say for yourself?”

“I’m innocent! It’s not true! I didn’t insult the Prophet!”

Immediately after I’d protested my innocence I was manhandled into the police van and driven away. During the journey I passed out from pain and only came back to myself as we were arriving at Sheikhupura prison, where I was thrown into a cell.

Since that day I haven’t left prison.

                In the intervening years since her arrest and conviction, while the high court has repeatedly delayed her appeal, Aasiya has languished in jail.  Aasiya has to cook her own food, provided by the prison guards, due to fears that she will be poisoned by another inmate.  In January of 2011, Salman Taseer, the governor of Punjab province where Aasiya lives, was assassinated because he, although a Muslim, had spoken out against Pakistan’s blasphemy laws and had supported a pardon for her.  In March of the same year Shahbaz Bhatti, the only Christian member of Pakistan’s cabinet and another who had spoken out in support of Aasiya, was also murdered.

                The high court has been internationally embarrassed by Aasiya’s case.  But they are afraid to give her the appeal she has requested out of fear of radical Islamist militants and the civil chaos as well as personal injury they might cause.  So the government is biding its time, hoping Aasiya will just quietly die in prison.

                Aasiya’s family has been deprived of their wife and mother.  They have gone into hiding because of death threats.  And their fears are very real considering what has already happened to those who tried to support their mother. 

Aasiya’s daughter Alishba had this to say:

" We are praying and fasting for our mother so that she can be with us, I visit her with my father and each time I meet her, i cant stop myself and tears pour out. My mother tries to hold my hand through the gaps between the grilled window and says, have faith in the Lord, He will bring me home one day. Every time I hear these words, I cry to the Lord to bring back my mother so that we can be with her again."

And her youngest daughter poured out her heart in these words:

" It has been months I have not met my mother, I am scared... I just see her pictures and can't control my tears. I fear that I will not be able to see my mother in the condition she is in. As I have the pleasant memories of her when she was with us, so I cannot even imagine what she is going through. 
There are times I even lose all the hope of seeing her ever again, so I want to keep the memories of her smiling and playing with us. If she comes back to us, I will forget this whole thing as a bad dream."

                Voice of the Martyrs has been supporting Aasiya since her arrest.  They are working on a 1,000,000 member petition (currently at 681,239 signatures) to be delivered to the Pakistani embassy in Washington D.C. to plead for Aasiya’s release.  To add your name to this petition, find out other ways you can help, or just to find out more information about Aasiya Bibi’s situation please visit www.callformercy.com.  At the very least please join us each day in praying earnestly and steadfastly for God’s grace to sovereignly intervene on behalf of Aasiya.  Hebrews 13:3 instructs us to “Remember the prisoners, as though in prison with them, and those who are ill-treated, since you yourselves also are in the body.”  An excellent opportunity to obey this command corporately is coming up one week from tomorrow on October 6^th.  We invite you to join us at Daniels Bible Church for our monthly prayer meeting for the persecuted church.

Living In The Cloud

On May 15, 2014 Don Pfleger departed this life.  He was without question one of the best men I have ever known.  If I was forced to choose one quality that I admired the most about Don it would be his humility.  A man who, according to human wisdom, should have had much to be prideful about simply was not.  I have seen him withstand withering verbal public assaults upon his character and actions without saying a word in return.  I have seen him teach complicated theological truths that were difficult to grasp without ever sensing that he was trying to force his own views onto other people.  I have been behind closed doors with Don in highly sensitive and potentially contentious meetings and never did I get the impression that he was trying to throw his weight around in order to arrive at the decision he desired.  In all of these instances the humility of this incredible man of God has stood out to me in stark relief over the years.

And what a span of years they were.  Don watched me attempt to bull my way through life as an ignorant teenager.  He provided wisdom to my future wife and I as we prepared for the creation of our marriage.  He counseled me to be faithful as I contemplated the destruction of that marriage due to my own selfishness.  He engaged me on a deeply intellectual level through four years of exhaustive classes on theology.  He bared his soul to me in small group meetings, never hesitating to display his own weaknesses.  He showed trust in me by asking me be an intern with the Elders of Daniels Bible Church.  He challenged me to get out of my comfort zone and minister through teaching the word of God.  Through all of this I have continued to sense that Don was deeply interested in my life and was coaching me from the sidelines.  He once said to me, in reference to the Christian life; "You are allowed to stumble but if you ever fall I'm going to kick you in the seat of the pants."

This type of challenging yet loving interaction characterized the impact Don had on my life.  And as I drove home from work after hearing that he had passed away an amazing thought occurred to me. 

Hebrews chapter 11 takes the reader through a whirlwind tour of men and women through the ages who lived by and were known for their faith.  Abel, Enoch, Noah, Abraham, Sarah, Isaac, Jacob, Joseph, Moses, Rahab, Gideon, Barak, Samson, Jephthah, David, and Samuel.  It reads like a who's who of the Old Testament.  All of these people gained approval from God through the faith He had provided to them.  Yet in their lifetimes they did not receive what was promised because that promised glorification is not complete until all those who are to be saints of God are adopted into His family.  What this means is that we, every authentic disciple of Christ, are joined with these giants of faith in completing the gospel growth that God has ordained for us.  

The Apostle Paul pictures it throughout his letters as a great race to be run and finished.  In this Mediterranean culture steeped in Greek Olympics and Roman chariot races Paul used the symbol of a race to picture the Christian life.  The concept of persevering through trials is symbolized by a runner continuing to run in spite of pain and fatigue experienced in the body.  Finishing the race represents our glorification and completion in being made into the likeness of Christ.  And as it relates to my thought, all of those people of faith mentioned in Hebrews 11 are in the stands as former runners, cheering us on as we stumble, pant for breath, complete laps, keep on running, and ultimately finish our own race.  Hebrews 12:1 explains it perfectly: Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us.  

The thought that struck me the other day was this; Don is in that cloud now!  He is a part of the great assembly of witnesses that is cheering for us and exhorting us to keep running no matter the cost.  He is in the stands while we who are alive and remain are tasked with carrying on the legacy left by him and all the other saints throughout history who have preceded us.  Just as he did in physical life Don is, in physical death, still encouraging, warning, challenging, and guiding us.  The only difference is that now, instead of doing it through spoken word he is doing it through our memories of him.  And although we can no longer hear him with our physical ears, God's word makes it clear that he is still very much cheering us on.  

2 Corinthians 4:17 refers to this life and the troubles it carries as "momentary, light affliction."  In no time at all in the grand scheme of eternity this life will be over.  Don, I see the finish line.  I'm not to the end of my race yet and I don't know how long it will take to get there.  But I will see you "soon" dear friend.  I salute you.

Ashamed of the Gospel

Romans 1:16 reads as follows: For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek.

Ashamed:  a :  feeling shame, guilt, or disgrace b :  feeling inferior or unworthy

I have been ashamed of the gospel of Jesus Christ for most of my adult life.  Whether it was due to feeling that I didn't know enough at the time, fear of ridicule, or fear of being looked at differently my reticence has held my tongue on many occasions over the years when I should have boldly proclaimed my allegiance to the lord Jesus Christ.  I don't want to be ashamed any more.  And due to His faithfulness, God has been very gracious in providing me with an chance to prove it.

Recently I was afforded the opportunity to interview for a new position as a central office technician with the company I currently work for, Frontier Communications.  This job would require me to perform maintenance and trouble-shooting on the company's internal network traffic equipment.  In other words, I would be responsible for ensuring that all the different equipment across West Virginia continue to talk to each other.  For anyone who knows me, and knows how much of a tech geek I am, it will be apparent that this job would be right up my alley.  To ice the cake it would be a significant pay increase.

From the beginning I was content to rest in God's will for this situation.  If He willed it I would be happy to take the new job.  If He willed it I would be happy to stay where I was at.  I want to be very clear that this God centered attitude is not due to any merit on my part.  The Lord has made it very easy for me to take this view about any prospective job opportunities, because I am quite content with the position I currently have.

So as I contemplated the possibility of being hired for this position one thing became immediately clear to me.  I did not have the experience with the company's infrastructure that others might have who had probably also applied for this position.  In addition to that I lack a college diploma in a relevant discipline.  So it seemed that I would be at a disadvantage from the outset in terms of my qualifications for the job.  Regardless of any technical aptitude I might have, that is difficult to quantify without a diploma or equivalent work experience.

Thus the question I began to ask myself was "Why would they want to hire me over someone more experienced?".  After some thought, I decided that one thing I bring to the table that someone else might not is Godly character.  Through my relationship with Jesus and the process of sanctification which is a natural result of that my loyalty, integrity, dependability, and honesty have all increased over the years.  Regardless of whether someone has been born again those are desirable qualities in an employee.  So I thought that if I was able to get an interview I could point to my natural aptitude for technology but really try to cement my eligibility with a character based approach.

At some point during the wait to see if I would get an interview a thought sprang into being in my mind.  This could be a fantastic opportunity to stand up for Jesus and risk being shamed for the gospel so that I would not be ashamed of the gospel.  Woah!  This was dangerous ground I was treading into.  After all, even though I was content in my current job, I obviously would like to have the new one.  I did not know the hiring manager's background and thus had no way of knowing whether boldly proclaiming the name of Christ in a business setting like that would torpedo my chances of being hired.  Was I really willing to put my money where my mouth was?  The more I thought and meditated upon these issues I became determined that regardless of the risks involved I had to do this.  How could I lead my family in following Christ unless I was willing to give them an example to follow.  Words are meaningless unless they are accompanied by actions.

The morning of the interview finally dawned.  I needed to drive to Charleston to keep the appointment.  As I drove my thoughts centered upon my sufficiency in Christ and the enabling power of the Holy Spirit.  I prayed "God please give me an opening and help me to have no fear or hesitation.  Help me to represent You well."  I enlisted the aid of others in praying, not that I would get the job but that I would not be ashamed of the gospel.

I arrived at my destination, met the hiring manager, and proceeded with the interview.  We discussed several technical questions, my current knowledge of various company systems, and my prior work experience with situations similar to what might arise if I was employed in this new position.  I patiently waited for the right opportunity.  Finally the moment of truth arrived.  My interviewer asked "Is there anything else you would like to share?".  Bingo!  What proceeded next was something approximately like this: "As I contemplated this position I realized that I might not have the work experience that others will who might have applied.  So I asked myself, why would they want to hire me over someone else who is more technically qualified.  The answer is that technical skills can be trained.  Education can be given to enable someone to perform specific job functions.  But something that can't be trained is character.  Honesty, loyalty, integrity, and dependability is what I bring to the table.  And these qualities of mine are a direct result of my relationship with Jesus Christ.  Whether someone shares that faith in Him is not the point.  The point is that as a supervisor my character is something you can bank on.  This isn't because I am a great person.  It's because the source of my character comes from outside of myself, through my faith in Jesus."

Yes!  Slam dunk!  Game, set, match!

The response I received from this was favorable.  I was not asked anything about the gospel and so there was not an overt opportunity to evangelize.  But I was fine with that.  If God wanted me to share deeper truth I believe He would have opened that door by steering the conversation in that direction.  What was important to me was that I boldly stood up to be counted among the faithful of Jesus Christ.  So in my mind the interview was a smashing success because that was the whole focus of it for me.  I don't know yet whether I will be offered the position or not.  But that is mostly irrelevant for me (I say mostly because again, I wouldn't mind at all having this job) because the goal I had was resoundingly met.  And for that I give praise and thanks and honor to the sovereign Lord who orchestrated the entire situation as He did.

Will you join me in being shamed for the gospel but not being ashamed of the gospel?

Soli Deo Gloria

Cats, Fathers, and Cradles

I think I've always been secretly terrified of being the father described in "Cats in the Cradle" by Harry Chapin.  

For those unfamiliar with the song, it's about a man who is too busy with work and life to be there to spend time with his son.  His son learns to walk while he is away, presumably on a business trip.  For his 10th birthday the man purchases his son a ball.  The boy wants his father to play with the new ball with him but dad has too much work to do.  Throughout these boyhood snapshots the little boy constantly says that he wants to be just like his dad some day.  

Later, we see the son coming from college.  By this time life has slowed down for the man.  He wants to sit and talk with his son who is on the verge of adulthood.  But all the kid is interested in is borrowing the car.  The final scene describes the father after retirement, calling his son to talk.  But once again the son is too busy to spend time with his "old man."  The song concludes as the father finally realizes, in the twilight of his life, that his son did indeed turn out just like him in the worst possible way.

I've linked the song below in case you're interested in hearing it.

I have a love/hate relationship with this "stupid" song.  I love the musical composition.  And Harry Chapin was great at weaving a tale through his lyrical abilities (although apparently the inspiration for the song was a poem written by his wife, but I digress).  But it's such a horribly bittersweet song filled with pain, heartache, and a wasted life that it makes me pensive with thought every time I listen to it.  I've often wondered if there's a deeper reason for the way this song plays with my emotions.

My own father was out of the picture in my life at a very early age; 2 or 3 I believe.  Although I had variously frequent and infrequent contact with him as the years went by I grew up without his daily presence.  I never recall having any mental or emotional issues because of this.  Perhaps it was because the separation happened when I was too young to really grasp what was going on.  Perhaps it's a credit to my mother for working tirelessly to instill a solid foundation of self worth in me.  Most likely it's a mixture of both reasons.

I think it's because of this solid personal stability that I've been blessed with that I have never felt unduly saddened by the disconnection I experienced with my father.  And listening to "Cats in the Cradle" never results in me missing my dad.  What it does do is terrify me.  It terrifies me that I might unknowingly become the father described in the song; so busy with my life that I neglect being a presence in my children's lives.  Logically I know perfectly well that I am nowhere near the man described in the song.  And for that matter I know full well that I am nowhere near my own father, at least in terms of my bond with my children.  Nevertheless, every single time I've listened to it over the years, "Cats in the Cradle" unfailingly manages to produce this subtle paranoia in the back of my mind.  The fear is reinforced as I watch my son grow older and I see how our interests are diverging with the passage of time.  As he grows it seems to take more effort on my part to find ways to spend time with him.  I am tremendously thankful that I see the danger presented by that particular relational cliff now rather than years from now through the crystal clear mirror of hindsight.

I've often wondered if this completely irrational secret worry of mine has its roots in the childhood absence of my dad.  Curious, very curious.  But regardless of where it comes from I won't trade this fear for anything.  I believe fear can be healthy if managed well.  I never want to lose my fear of being a bad father.  It pulls me back from the brink of anger when I'm especially aggravated by the kids.  It keeps me grounded when I'm feeling selfish and tired of sacrificing my time for my family.  It gives me clarity when reflecting the morning after a particularly poor night of parenting.  It keeps me mindful and appreciative of the devotion shown me by my heavenly father.  It drives me to strive to be the teaching father of Proverbs 4:1-9, the compassionate father of Psalm 103:13, and the non provoking father of Ephesians 6:4.

So I will keep this particular baseless and irrational fear thank you very much.